EZ Clap Coaching

It’s Friday and around 30 degrees in Western Europe, and there’s two kinds of people: Those with piled up work and those sitting on the beach living their best life.

So what could be the difference? Is it raw ambition? Or perhaps you find yourself having a hard time saying no. Some of the people on the beach might actually be ghosting things they are responsible for, too.

Among the biggest drivers of ghosting is overcommitting ourselves and taking on more than we can actually handle. It’s hard to admit that we can’t fulfil our promises and might disappoint others in the process. Some people may then find silence easier than being in communication, which is when ghosting ensues. Letting go of that feeling of shame or guilt can be a relief, and transparency is more often than not appreciated by the other person. It also shows you respect the other person’s time, when you still need to let them know about that job interview, important deadline or invitation to a meeting.

Nowadays we all wear multiple hats and while learning to say no and bring tough news, we may also learn to do so with more empathy. While acknowledging a colleague or client may have a problem, listen to understand the problem rather than immediately accepting to solve it. And explain how your current workload does not permit you to promise to solve it. 

From a personal point of view, I really notice the difference in employers in my current job search, even now when the job market is tight. Promises not being held, meeting invites not being sent, no feedback. I’d rather hear what’s going on, really, even if it’s rejection. Being ghosted never trumps transparency.

✅ Listen to other perspectives and listen to understand rather than to respond

✅ Be transparent about your own workload, responsibilities and emotions

✅ Only make promises you are certain to fulfill

✅Enjoy the beach when it’s >30 degrees

Do you have experiences with ghosting or can you find the courage to admit you can improve?